The Curious Case of Benjamin Button

Benjamin Button is an unusual individual, born with a curious abnormality. Hence the title.


Mr Button was born as an old man and grows younger with time. The reason behind this is never really explored, nor is it very important. The film begins with a clock maker who, after losing his son in WWI, makes a public clock which ticks backwards in hope that his son, and all the other lost sons, may one day come home. The clock was put up when Benjamin was born and taken down when he died, but is otherwise unconnected to Benjamin's life or the plot of the film.

The film tells the life story of Benjamin, as told by his diary and the woman he loved on her death bed. Born as WWI came to an end, his mother died in childbirth and his father rejected him as a monster. He spent his early years as an old man in an old folks home, under the care of his adopted mother. Everyone around him expecting him to die regrettably young.

But as the years went by he became younger, stronger, more full of life. Heck, he became a regular little Brad Pitt.

The film is based on a short story by F. Scott Fitzgerald published in 1922. It was adapted for the screen by Eric Roth. For those who don't recognise the name, this is the same writer behind the legendary Forest Gump.

Having the same writer has led many to comment on the similarities between the two films. Button, like Gump, begins life with little hope, but with a mixture of fate, chance and the love of his mother he goes on to see the world. Button, like Gump, meets the love of his life when they are both "young" and keeps falling in and out of a relationship throughout the film. They both end up as father's who aren't around to see their children grow. They both fight in a war. They both meet a crazy captain. They both lead extrodinary lives and star in great films.

Still, the comparision is unfair for Button. Seeing the film by itself is like finding a pretty decent bag for a very reasonable price. Beautiful design, good quality leather, everything you could hope for. Comparing the film to Forest Gump is like finding that your bag is an immitation of a bag worth ten times the amount. Suddenly your lovely bag is branded as a knock-off and loses some of its original shine.

Button is a good film, certainly worth a watch, but it's not Gump. Despite many many similarities, Button is lacking in two key ingredients. Innocence and sense.

Gump shows the world through the eyes of a man who never really stops being a child. He knows right from wrong, and although he's "not a smart man" he "knows what love is." This simple innocence gives the film a magical quality which makes it enjoyable to watch time and time again. Button, on the other hand, is a man who never really gets to be a child. The film is therefore harsher, more "grown up" perhaps, and uncomparible to Gump.

Declaring that a film lacks the "sense" of Forest Gump may seem a little odd, and may possibly not be the right word, but Button is certainly lacking. The following examples contain spoilers, so for those who haven't seen it, just trust what you've read so far and go watch the film.


Firstly, the daughter seems to know nothing of Benjamin or her mother. She doesn't know her mother used to be a dancer, it comes as a surprise, despite the fact that one clip shows her at 12 years of age in her mothers dance school, where her mother teaches dance.

She doesn't seem to know that her "dad" is not her real dad, despite the fact that her real dad left her after the age of one and, presumably, her new dad didn't come on the sceen for a few weeks/months. Sure she might have been too young to, say, remember what her dad looked like, but she must have had some memory of her dad suddenly changing into a different man.


Their is a major flaw in logic when it comes to Button ditching his family. He leaves because his daughter deserves a father who will grow old with her... wtf? Why? Because it's soo much more comforting to see your parents go old and grey than young and healthly? He leaves because his wife won't be able to look after them both. He won't actually be a kid for another 20 years, by which point the daughter could look out for herself anyway. This point is proved by the fact that the mother DOES end up looking after Benjamin anyway!! (The daughter at this point magically disappears. Also, her replacement dad grew old and died before this time anyway.) It just doesn't add up. Growing young is simply not a big disability, certainly not enough to ditch your wife and child over and still try to look like the good guy.

I can't be a father. 20 years from now I might be small and cute. You both deserve better.

It's guys like this that make Fathers for Justice need to work so hard to be heard.

Still, overall it is a nice film.

The Day the Earth Stood Still.

The story in a nutshell:

Alien (K. Reaves), pops over on his summer hols to make new friends. He lands his big sphere thing, steps out and goes to shake hands with a local girl and ask for directs to the nearest Maccies, it was a long trip and he's hungry. Enter US law enforcers.

"HE'S GOING TO SHAKE HANDS!!! SHOOT THE SH*T OUTA HIM!!!"

Bang. Ouch. Down Mr Alien goes.

"STOP FIRING! This amo is expensive.."

What to do after killing an Alien? Rush him to hospital to save his life.

"We did it. We saved him. We're heros."

Meanwhile Alien's big pet robot "Gurt" has been left behind by the sphere. A highly advanced piece of Alien technology, what to do with it...

"CALL IN THE PLANES!! BLOW THE SH*T OUTA IT!"

Bang. Ouch. Planes go down. This is Gurt, not some silly Mr Reaves. Don't mess with Gurt.

Alien wakes up, he knows our language... "... Mac Donalds... Burger...."

Typical take me to your leader comments from Alien, but the President has decided he doesn't want to talk. Instead he wants Alien locked up and tortured for info. Alien decides to leave and go to MacDonalds.

Seriously. That actually happens.

After seeing the price of a burger at Maccies, he decides humanity is fu*ked up and tells Gurt to wipe us all out. Enter Will Smith Jr.

"Reaves, ur a di*k. If my dad was here he would totally wipe you and your kind outa existence."

"I doubt that."

"No, he would, haven't you seen Independence Day."

"I have seen the error of my ways, humanity deserves a second chance, Gurt lets go home."

The End.

The moral of the story is that humanity is killing the Earth and that to save the plannet we need to give up are materilistic ways. Funily enough, it trys to give us this message while plugging adverts for just about everything, from Maccies to Microsoft to Honda and many many more. It somehow lessens the impact.

Even further reducing the impact of it's core message is the feable attempts to excuse us of our destructive ways. Enter big science guy:

"Every civilisation needs to go to the brink of destruction before it can evolve into decent beings."

"Your right, for us are Sun was about to explode."

Wait. Thats not the same thing, unless it was about to exlode because you were blowing the sh*t outa it. And he's clearly not right. Humanity is smart enough to know whats coming, they need to do something ASAP. Gurt! Where's Gurt? Gurt, step on this scientist.

Finally, a comment about the unnamed Mr President. He refuses to talk to Mr Alien, he refuses to even think about talking about talking, he likes to blow the SH*T outa stuff, even stuff thats clearly not blow-up-able. He hires T-Bag (racist murdering child molesting pyscho from Prison Break) as his chief army guy and the chick from Misery (pyschotic novelist fan) as his chief of defense. OK, it refuses to actually say his name, but I think we can all spot Bush from a mile away by now.

Imagine the film with Obama in charge:


Alien (K. Reaves), pops over on his summer hols to make new friends. He lands his big sphere thing, steps out and goes to shake hands with the president Obama, waiting to greet him.

"You must be hungry Mr Alien, I'll take you to Maccies, dinner's on me."

"Wow, what a nice Change to the normal response I get. Can we be friends?"

"Yes, We Can."

The End.

Changeling

In 1928, a boy named Walter Collins went missing in L.A. Several months later a boy was returned safetly to his mother. Problem was, it was the wrong boy. When the mother pointed this out no one would believe her. To avoid admitting to their mistake, the police instead tried to force the mother into accepting her new son and when that failed they declared her crazy and had her locked up in an insane asylum.

It's not a very believable story, apart from the fact that, disturbingly, it's true.

It is difficult to put into words the powerful effect of this movie. The acting was superb. The camera work breath taking. The storyline heavy, to say the least.

Most people think of "Dark Knight" as the big bad of 2008. Well imagine Dark Knight, but with Joker killing kids, no Batman to save the day and being based on a true story. If your looking for a light hearted film, Changeling is probably not the place to start.

The tagline for this movie is, "To find her son, she did what no one else dared." This tagline is somewhat misleading. In fact, the scariest part of this film is that to find her son, Ms Collins does what almost anyone would do, she goes to the people put there to protect us and those people manage to take the worst thing that could ever happen to a mother and make it ten times worse.

The film shows how power can currupt and how absolute power can currupt absolutely. How a police officer, who presumably at some point believed in justice, can grow a God-complex as he rises the ranks when the ranks aren't clean.

Great film. Go watch it. Take tissues.

I am Legend

Back in his school days, life was so much simpler for Dave. At home he played computer games, in school he slept and conversations with friends focused on comic books, vampires and zombies. One such conversation had his friend Macca telling him about a great book he was reading,

"It's really cool. Everyone on Earth has been turned into a vampire and only one man is left alone to fight them."

"You realise," said Dave, "That that makes him the bad guy."

"No. He's cool."

"If he's the last man on Earth then the vampires can't be killing anyone and he's not protecting anyone. He's the bad guy."

Skip ahead a week or two.

"Yeah, turns out you were right. The end of the book he realises he's the monster. The vampires talk about him as a legend. A creature of the day."

Skip ahead seven years.

Will Smith in a new movie were he's the last man on Earth and everyone else has turned into a monster.

'Hmmm...', thought Dave, 'That sounds familar...'

Skip ahead another year.

Dave had now been without Jean for a month. That morning he decided to give blood. Later, bored and finding it difficult to type with a plaster on his right hand and a needle hole in his left arm, he headed over to TVlinks to find something to watch.

"I am Legend", Will Smith, last man on Earth battling monsters. Switch Earth with his house and monsters with a thesis and Dave could relate.

Story time:

Scientists have mutated the measles virus to create a cure for cancer. Yay! Unfotunately it mutates again and ends up having some small side effects: 90% of infected die, remaining 10% lose intellect, suffer from increased rage, cannibalistic tendencies and become hyper sensitive to sunlight to such an extent that it kills them. It also becomes super contagious. On the plus side, no more cancer and improved night vision.

Less than 1% of people are immune. Unfortunately for them, the infected like eating them and three years after the outbreak only Will is left, with his dog Sam of cause.

Life isn't too bad for Will. In the morning he hunts deer which are now roaming the empty streets of new york. At midday he waits around by the docks to see if anyone has responded to his constant radio signal which keeps repeating a message which says something like "Friends wanted, come see me by the dock, I'm there everyday at noon," but he must come across too needy because no one ever shows. In the afternoon he plays around in his lab with infected rats to find a cure. If something seems to work on a rat he catches an infected human to play with. So far they all die on him. At night he locks up his house and has a nice sleep. Or watches a DVD. He's seen Shrek so many times he knows every word of it.

*Spoilers ahead, look away now.*

Isn't it strange how nothing can really happen for three years then suddenly it all happens at once? It's Will's bday, he ends up getting in a fight, his dog gets infected, he kills his dog, he loses will to live, goes out to kill infected at night, is about to die when someone saves him. Someone responded to his radio call. Good timing or what? He stays consious just long enough to tell them where he lives.

It's a woman and a kid, using some kind of bright light to scare away the infected. They're immune like Will, heard his radio call. Came to say hi as they pass through, they're on their way to a place up in the mountains where all the other surivors are. Will seems upset, "No, your ruining the story, I'm suppose to be the last man on Earth. Maybe a girl and a kid I can just about accept, but a whole village of survivors in the mountains? That takes the biscuit."

Night falls, the infected show up wanting candy. "Trick or Treat". Turns out they were followed home last night. Not to worry, Will's had three years to transform his home into a fortress. Less than 3 minutes later the infected are inside. The three run down into the lab, the infected not far behind them, and lock themsleves in an isolated glass chamber where they find Will's latest test dummy girl is actually starting to turn human again. Again, great timing or what?

A male pushes his way to the front of the infected and starts hurling himself at the glass. It begins to crack.

The movie now has two alternative endings. Lots of internet debate goes on as to which is better.

The original ending tries to follow closer to the book. Will realises this male is the females partner and the infected just want her back. There are clues throughtout the movie that the infected still have basic human emotions and Will realises they can still love. He opens the doors, releases the girl and the infected go away happy. He remembers all the infected he has killed so far and realises he is the monster.

A test audience didn't like this ending, so they changed it. The ending it was released with is as follows:

Will realises they have no hope. They're trapped. He takes a sample of the test dummies blood gives it to the girl with the kid, shoves them in a hole in the wall and tells them to stay there till dawn, the blood has the cure in it. He then pulls out a hand grenade and blows himself and the infected to little bits. The next day the girl and the kid drive to the safe spot in the mountains they were talking about. It's there, just like they said, full of survivors. Will becomes a legend. The man who gave his life to save humanity.

There are pleanty of questionable moments in the film. For example, why were the girl and the kid still around at night when Will needed saving? Rule number one of survival being don't go out at night, how did they manage to survive so long? Why was Will's house so rubbish? Given the situation you'd imagine at least that the place to be packed full of weapons and ammo "just in case" and a load of UV lights wouldn't hurt. Some kind of excape plan maybe? I mean he has had three years to think about it, with enough spare time to memorise every word of Shrek.

But none of those littler things matter. The main let down is that the ending sucked. Both of them.

In the first, despite the clues that the infected have feelings, the idea that they just walk away is stupid. They have a history of eating the non-infected, what stops them from killing Will and co? Lets say they can be thought of as primative humans. Primative humans slaughtered all other evolving monkeys to extinction and usually weren't very nice to each other either. Will should be dead.

In the second, WTF? There is a village of survivors in the mountains less than a days ride away?!?! And not one of these survivors thought about trying to contact the outside world? Will has been sending out a radio message "on every frequency" every day for three years. Can't get a signal up in the hills. Well send the occasinal person down. It's perfectly save during the day. Send out your own messages. Swine.

*Spoilers finished, you can look back now.*

Hancock

The original John Hancock was some American guy, famous for signing some American independence paper or some such. Not well known this side of the pond, but important enough to the Americans that "John Hancock" became slang for "signiture".

This latest John Hancock will prove to be far more rememberable. An amazing film, although judging by various internet comments floating around it tends to have a Marmitian feel to it, in that you either love it or you hate it. Story time.

80 years ago, a man woke in hospital with no memory of who or what he was. The big hole in his head healed up pretty darn quick and any attempt to give him needles simply saw them brake on his skin. Had the accident somehow made him superhuman? Or if he had always been superhuman, how did he get the big hole in his head to begin with? No one knew. Despite the story being all over the news, no one ever came to tell him who he was. No one ever showed up. He was alone.

On leaving the hospital he was asked to put his "John Hancock" on a document. He took this as his name.

Skip ahead 80 years. Police cars racing after a get-away car. Bullets flying everywhere. The Americans call it a Monday.

"Hancock?"

"uurr.."

"Hancock?!"

John Hancock (Will Smith), lay face down on a public bench, surrounded by empty beer bottles. A little child attempting to wake him.

"What's up kid?"

"Badguys," said the child, impatiently, pointing to the news report. Stopping just long enough to pinch a sexy girl's bottom and pick up another bottle of beer, Hancock springs into action, destoying the bench in the process.

Turns out flying drunk is not as easy as it sounds. Crashing into birds, traffic signs, accidently taking out most of the police cars and almost hitting a plane, Hancock then stops the criminals in the rather unorthadox method of picking up the car and dropping it onto a rather large building.

The news report, far from praising Hancock, reports yet another huge mess he's caused, this time costing the city around 6 million in damages, a new personal best for Hancock.

80 years of solitude has turned Hancock into an unpopular miserable drunk. Will Smith pulls it off perfectly and you can not help but laugh.

"I can smell the liquor on his breath"

-"Thats cos I've been drinking bitch."

"She should sue you", says an over weight man

-"You should sue McDonalds, cos they've messed you up good."

For those who haven't seen it, pop down to your local cinema, then come down and finish reading this.

Unfortunately, there is a downside to the film. The main female of the plot, married lady Mary (Charlize Theron). Her story simply doesn't make any sense and it jumps around all over the place. To begin with, she is a concerned housewife. Her husband has taken a liking to Hancock and took it upon himself to improve Hancock's image and life. She seems, naturally, concerned about having a guy known for mass destruction around the house.

Things then start to develop. Turns out Hancock has a thing for her. With her husband out of sight he gives her "the look", she kinda returns it, he goes in for the kiss. She throws him through the wall.

OK, so turns out she's not quite a normal house wife. She refuses to tell him, or the audience, who she is simply telling him to stay away. Obviously, after 80 years of solitude, he refuses to do so. In exchange for keeping her secret from her husband, she agrees to meet up for a chat. She seems to hate him with a passion at this point.

She lets him know they are the last two of there kind, imortals created by "the Gods". The others have all died. She tries to pass herself off as his sister, but based on the physical attraction between them and possibly the fact that he's black and she's white, Hancock doesn't buy it. His refusal to believe this causes her to get even more pissed. They end up having a huge superhero type fight, which for some reason causes hurricanes. They also decide to do this in front of Hubby, so much for the secret.

She confesses to her husband that technically she's married to Hancock, but they broke up decades ago, Hancock just doesn't remember. She tried so many times over the centuries to get rid of him, but they just end up drawn to each other. But she doesn't want Hancock, she wants him.

At this point, the logical guesses might be Hancock and Mary used to date, but Hancock clearly did something to piss her off. Perhaps he was suppose to take her out those 80 years ago but never showed due to whatever happened to him? Or perhaps his drinking problems started before he could remember? Or... what? For some reason she was pissed.

Hancock does what he always does at times like this, he goes off to buy booze. There are guys with guns holding the shop keeper hostage. Americans call this late night shopping. He stops them, while causing destruction to half the shop, only to find the gunshot to his stomach has resulted in a bullet hole. Huh.

He's rushed to hospital, where Mary shows up as another new character. Turns out now she's truely madly deeply in love with Hancock. All sweet with puppy dog eyes. She lets him know that the reason he can be shot is that when they're together they turn each other mortal. She left him for his own good, because so many times when they were together he risked his life to save her. That time 80 years ago had been one such time, when they were attacked by a gang. When she discovered he had forgotten everything she had decided it best to disappear so he would never be harmed again. Fair enough. But what was with all that seriously pissed, fighting in town centre causing hurricanes nonsense? What was wrong with giving him a little heads up that he might not be so bullet proof any more?

Anyway, despite this, Hancock is a great film and a breath of fresh air in the comic book world (although having never actually been a comic book). Definately worth a watch.

The Incredible Hulk.

The Incredible Hulk story has done the rounds, and this latest instalment had all the basic plot elements. Experiment goes wrong. Man becomes monster. Goes on the run. Big bad ass Team America hunts him down with the typical shoot first and ask questions later approach. Hulk Smash.

However, this latest adaptation also had some extra little gems to help it shine. For the fan-boys, references to Captain America, S.H.I.E.L.D and Iron Man will have them giddy, whilst cameos from Stan Lee and the original Hulk will keep them smiling and a failed translation attempt by Banner causing him to say "Don't make me hungry, you wouldn't like me when I'm hungry" will get the chuckles.

For the slightly less hardcore, simpler pleasures can be obtained from the mix of emotion and action, along with explainations of why the Hulk's pants don't burst and one of the finest sex scenes in comic book movie history.

Best Hulk film to date, but hopefully not as good as the next one.

Ratatouille

Another Orange Wednesday, another 2 for 1 film for Dave and Jean. This time it was Pixar's new movie Ratatouille.

Before the movie, Pixar gave an incredibly funny Pixar short about an Alien learning to drive a spaceship. Although probably less than 5 minutes in length, this short alone was worth the entrance fee. A description is omitted here since it would fail to do it justice and simply spoil it for any who haven't seen.

The movie itself was about a genius/crazy rat named Remy. Genius in that Remy used his hightened sense of smell to become the worlds greatest chef. Crazy in that he was willing to risk his life and the lives of family and friends for food, ingredients and a cook book. Another perculiar character trait of his was his views on stealing, which he refused to do when he was near dying of starvation but was willing to do later to save face in front of his brother. In summary, Remy was odd.

Ratatouille explores very deep issues in a very soft light hearted way. Remy himself is caught between two worlds, neither of which he feels he belongs to. For his family he "pretends" to be a rat, for his love of cooking he pretends to be "human" (via using a simple minded human as a giant puppet, which may seem a bit odd but still makes more sense than him dressing up in clothes and walking on stilts). In addition, he had to deal with the obvious racisim against him and had to work 10 times harder just to be considered equal.

Jean felt Remy was someone she could relate to. Being Chinese in England can very much feel like being a rat in a kitchen at times. Jean often found it hard to adjust to life in the UK. From the occasional snigger from a kid saying, "Ni hao," as he walked past to out-right racist remarks there was always a reminder coming just around the corner that this wasn't home. Even well meaning individuals didn't help with comments such as "I find it really funny when they shout in Chinese." At the same time, Jean had left China for a reason and had grew further away from it with the passing of time. If she couldn't stay and she couldn't leave, what should she do?

Ratatouille looks at all of this, but makes it suitable for children. It keeps the humour coming throughout and some viewers may not even notice the more serious notes. Emile, Remy's brother, is never far from the screen to ensure things don't get to heavy, despite being incredibly overweight himself. Emile is a fun loving rat, never lets things stress him. Eats anything, overweight, absolutely NO taste at all with zero potential of ever being anything remotely like a chef. Here was a character Dave could relate to.

The overall story line was fairly predictable. Useless guy meets crazy mouse, form a cooking team. Guy becomes great head chef, finds female chef, live happily ever after. The "villians" of the story being the former head chef who isn't keen to lose his job and a very strict food critic who works in a coffin shaped office on a skull looking type writer. The comment is made that he is incredibly thin for a man who likes food to which he replies,

"I don't LIKE food, I LOVE it! And I ONLY SWALLOW what I LOVE!"

This reminded Dave of a similar comment Aline had once made during a game of "Truth or Dare", but that was about a rather different topic.

When the movie was over, Dave checked his phone. 1 missed call. Why? Why did he only ever seem to recieve calls when he was in the cinema? How did people know? Was there a website somewhere advertising what times Dave would be unable to answer?

Overall a good film.