Hall Pass

WARNING: DO NOT WATCH THIS MOVIE

Now that we’ve got that out of the way, let’s take a look at the painful experience that is Hall Pass.

Two couples, Rick and Maggie and Fred and Grace, are going through some though times. Maggie and Grace are upset because Rick and Fred are obsessed with sex, constantly looking at other girls and making dirty jokes. Rick and Fred are upset because Maggie and Grace have lost all sexual interest towards them, pretending to be asleep whenever an opportunity for sex occurs.

What’s that? Two couples on the verge of divorce? What a great idea for a comedy!

Taking advice from a friend, the wives decide to give the husbands “Hall Passes,” a week off from marriage for them to do whatever they want, get it all out their systems, then come back to have a stronger relationship.

OK, with emotionally painful back stories in place it’s finally time to bring on the comedy.

Shit.

That’s about as far as it gets for comedy. Oh, that and showing some penises. Talking about and showing shit and penises. They don’t even try to work it into the story, they’re just there for no real reason other than “shit and penises are funny.”

OK, done with the comedy, let’s get back to the emotional torture.

So it turns out that the wives decide that they should also be allowed to do whatever they want. Unlike their male counterparts, however, having random sex is pretty easy for a girl, so you can dismiss any more “hilarious” failed attempts. Instead they just sit there, guys approach them and they have to make the “hilarious” decision of whether or not they want to have an affair.

This film has nothing going for it.

It’s not funny. It’s not romantic. It will not leave you with a warm fuzzy feeling. At no point does it trigger any positive emotions at all.

In summary:

DON’T WATCH!